Gastro Gnome - Eat Better Wherever

Worst Hotel you’ve ever stayed at ..

The Lamar Inn in Lamar Colorado. We rolled into town late one night in April after we’d just drove through a blizzard heading to Texas. Seen quite a few vehicles in the parking lot so figured it couldn’t be a bad place. Should have known right away when the front desk person had a coke nail. Paid for our room and went to go park. Found most of the cars were up on blocks and there wasn’t an actual vehicle in the parking lot that was drivable. Opened our room and it smelled like death warmed over. Went and ask the front desk person for our money back and we kept on driving through the night. Here’s some of the reviews online. There use to be some real nasty ones of blood in the bathroom and shit like that.
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Other one that was just sketchy was the sunset motel in Newtown,nd. Lived in that motel for over a year while working up there. Drug deals in the room beside us. Police did a sting op. In the room behind ours. You could leave your tool box unlocked and nothing would disappear but if you left a cooler in the pickup it was gone that night. We followed a blood trail down the street through our motel parking lot one morning in the snow leaving the bar that lead to this apartment building. The amount of blood that guy had lost I can’t imagine he lived
 
Green Mountain Motel in Jeffrey City, WY.
The dude running the “office” was perpetually drunk and repeated the same line to us each time we bumped into him. The room was disgusting. Camping in the parking lot under a tarp would’ve been a thousand times more sanitary. Never again.

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but dude, 4.5 stars!

musta been an off week, or you forgot you're actually just supposed to sleep in your tent on the lot.

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Hands down the worst was motel 6 in Capital Heights MD. Right next DC

During the early 90's my wife to be and I went to Washington DC to see the sights. being broke collage kids we settled for motel 6. Good motels in DC were way out of our price range so we settled for motel 6. Just after dark a local "business lady" opened up in the room up stairs. She did a banging business all night long. Several times during the night people would pound on the door. We could hear them talking, "I know they are in there". I don't know if they wanted to rob us or just sell drugs, we never opened the door.
 
Steam Train Hotel in Antonito, Colorado. Place was decent enough, but their smoking policy is crazy. All rooms are non-smoking for cigarettes, but are weed friendly, so you can smoke weed in all of the rooms but not cigarettes.
 
My worst stay was at the Rodeway in Ft. Morgan. We rolled in about 1:00 am and the rooms were ok(75/night so you can't expect much). The problem was the crackhead at the front desk gave the next person behind us the same room and we were too tired to bother setting the manual latch on our door. I woke up at 2:30 to a woman standing in front of my bed. I'm not sure who was more scared :ROFLMAO:. She ran out and I didn't sleep the rest of the night. Finally gave up at 5:00 am and got back on the road. My hunting partners only comment - "I heard you get up to pee once"
 
Motel 6 in Portland Oregon. I had to go there for work a long time ago (sometime around 2004-2005). I had driven all day from my office in Missoula and was tired when I got there. I pull the dirty bed cover off to sleep on the sheets and they were covered in blood.... not sure if it was a murder/rape/or just a bad period night for someone... and it was dry blood, not stained. I wasnt staying there. I called my boss and told him to get me a nice place or he could fly someone back to pick up his work truck. Ended up getting a really nice suite across the staye line in WA. It was a week long work trip, so I was happy for the upgrade. Havent touched a Motel 6 or Portland since then.
 
I've stayed at some crumby places, but nothing to the degree some of you have!

I have walked in to some motels, paid for a room, went to the room, then instantly went back for a refund and found somewhere else to stay. One in Devils Lake, ND, and one in Ft. Meyers Florida.
Same.
 
Even nice hotels have their moments. When me and my wife stay in OKC we usually stay at the Skirvin by Hilton a pretty classy place. A few years ago we checked in for our anniversary and I went to put a few things in the safe in our room. Opened it up and there sat a large blue sex toy! Bit of a awkward call to the front desk but they handled it like pros and got us into another room instantly. Still get a laugh out of it with the staff when we stay.
 
I travel a lot with my dogs, which means pet-friendly hotels and no matter how good the reviews online, they always give you a "pet room" that you had to pay $25-100 extra for and which always, with no exception so far, reeks of urine.
 
Han Guest House in Belize City 1982. We had bought our provisions for a week of camping on the Barrier Reef islands. Had to spend the night fending off the rats that wanted them. At least it was cheap.
 
It’s a tie between Bieber motel in Bieber CA and “cabin 6” in Jordan Mt. To be clear I was perfectly happy truck camping in both situations, but was influenced by members of my hunting party seeking more luxurious accommodations. Against my gut feeling and better judgement in both situations. Bieber was my first experience sleeping on a bed where the springs actually came through the bed to help massage you to sleep. But hey they did have a bird cleaning station. Lol. In Jordan we pulled up and asked if they had any rooms available and guy says no but we got “the cabin”, I slept with a 9mm in fear of whatever creatures came alive under in and around that cabin when the lights turned off. Both were easily good beginnings to a horror movie.
 
Even nice hotels have their moments. When me and my wife stay in OKC we usually stay at the Skirvin by Hilton a pretty classy place. A few years ago we checked in for our anniversary and I went to put a few things in the safe in our room. Opened it up and there sat a large blue sex toy! Bit of a awkward call to the front desk but they handled it like pros and got us into another room instantly. Still get a laugh out of it with the staff when we stay.

"Hello, Front desk? This is room 69. No, the room is fine, thanks for asking. Listen, there's a giant blue double ended dong in the safe. It doesn't have the sanitary seal on it anymore."

Y'all haven't worked in a crew for an asphalt contractor and it shows.
 
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