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Worst camp meal

On a backpack hunt with a neighbor's son who was my age. We were 35ish. We were hiking with the camp on our back each day. He was in charge of dehydrated meals. My only request: no bell peppers. First night we glass for mules until dark and the mountain is cooling off from 60s down towards freezing. He tosses me a dehydrated meal packet...has bell peppers, toss it back. Tosses me another. Bell peppers. Every last one has bell peppers. Okay, am hungry and is now in upper 40s. I drop in the heater pellet and the cup of water so the meal will warm up. Fold over the top and after a minute or two the packet pops letting out most of the steam. I eat cold, bell pepper infused gray chicken slab and rice in the cold wind. That is when you appreciate you are eating food as fuel rather enjoying the food as you eat it.
 
My dad makes red chile beef that is out of this world delicious but sometimes he feels the need to kick it into a higher heat gear than most humans will stand. My cousins, BIL and I like hot stuff but we've asked him repeatedly to keep it toned down, but he gets like a little kid and thinks it's funny if it's a bit too hot. On an elk hunt about 10 years back, he made some borderline hot that we ate the first night but there was enough leftover to have later in the hunt. He got the idea he should slow cook it with some habañero peppers for the second go-round. About took the hide off the inside of our mouths. Nobody (even my dad) could eat more than about 3 or 4 bites. We were afraid to throw it out that it might melt the bag and start a fire in the dry vegetation. The next morning when nature called, I was hopeful there weren't any varmint hunters nearby that could hear my howling. :eek:
 
My uncle's venison ribs. They are a gelatinous substance surrounded by kraut which I am also not a fan of. This uncle, also used to make limburger and onion sandwiches and would leave them on the dash of his truck while at work so they "would melt a bit" before lunch. Gross!!! :eek:
 
Breakfast = Pancakes w/syrup.....Lunch = flapjacks with jam.......Dinner = Griddlecakes with gravy! guide and camp cook my grandfather!.......good times! he has the same menu with potatoes:)
 
DKO said:
Breakfast = Pancakes w/syrup.....Lunch = flapjacks with jam.......Dinner = Griddlecakes with gravy! guide and camp cook my grandfather!.......good times! he has the same menu with potatoes:)
Click to expand...

At least it sounds edible
 
JohnCushman said:
On the HT bear hunt we were going to have steaks one night, so I figured I would make baked potatoes in the fire coals for everyone. Well, I've never done that before. I wrapped them in foil and went back to fishing. I came back a half hour later and a couple of them had exploded and the rest were hard as a rock and black as coal. So, I ended up making fried potatoes for everyone when they got back to camp.
Click to expand...

Well, those fried potatoes were awesome, and should probably go in the best meals thread.
 
My first ever backpack hunt (1998 in NM). I had read that granola with powdered milk would be a good breakfast, so I bought a whole bunch of granola and dumped in powered milk. (And I didn't taste test it before I left home)

I had also decided I would have a cold camp. (I ate my MH meals with cold water!)

Oh, did I forget to mention that I had packed in black pepper for meat care. The pepper taste leached through the double Ziploc bags and tainted the granola/milk combo.

I would sit in my bivy tent, morning after morning, choking down my breakfast (aka fuel). A Russian gulag ate better gruel than I had.
 
Last edited:
Not really the worst camp meal - but it reminds me of a story. I used to relish cold camps - no fire, stove etc. Just pack along Cliff bars and protein shakes for my fuel for the trip. I really didn't mind it (still don't) - but hot food isn't something I like to camp without now unless I have to.

I did a 5 day trip in the Spanish Peaks a few years ago. I had my lovely trail food along and was hitting a pretty good loop. One day I met a couple of guys on horseback. We chatted for awhile and they told me the location of their camp. They did invite me for dinner if I was interested - but I ended up camping that night a couple of miles from them and didn't want to bother.

While hiking out on my last day - I saw them at their camp cooking breakfast. We chatted a bit and they invited me for some food. Their spread had everything. Bacon, Sausage, Hashbrowns, eggs. The works - and had a great backcountry cook setup. I couldn't resist.

I ate more than my fill - especially with the previous 4 days of cold camping. With all the protein shakes I'd had - let's just say I was a little plugged up. Well, it took a little while for all that grease to work through my system - but it hit me a couple miles down the trail. Thank god for packing baby wipes.

Kind of the worst camp meals & the best camp meals in one story.
 
Years ago I had some hunters come to camp with some bear stew that was so greasy and nasty the dog turned around and left. It was like filling your mouth with Vicks vapor rub.
 
My friend shot a deer, gutted it and brought it back to camp in the back of his truck. He saved the heart and cooked it for dinner. Unknowingly the spare gas can in the back of his truck leaked out gas. One bite of filla-mon-heart and we were all gagging. Hard to believe it didn't blow up when it was cooking!
 
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